They were right my period is very heavy and I feel drained. Sill having hot flushes all the time, so haven’t experienced the freezing cold weather everyone is talking about.

This morning my hubby decided to stay home to look after me. It was lovely to be home together snuggled up watching tv and I felt like the world stood still for a bit to allow us to just be. 

I got an email from the Endo nurse at QA today saying she would try and arrange for me to see DR Guyer before Christmas or early in new year. 

I even applied to go on Dr Christians new series on tv thinking maybe I would get top notch help and raise more awareness of this horrid Disease and the suffering women go through. 

I am starting to feel a bit scared about what’s next, but I know that i need to take control of my health and get the treatment I need as soon as possible.

I began thinking about returning to work and social events in the calendar and I am starting to feel a bit anxious about seeing people and being asked how i am. 

Truth is I am ok at home feeling secure and don’t really feel ready for reality but I know that I will be needing more time off in the future for ops and I should be saving my sick. 

I still have it on my mind I should call drs tomorrow and get a fit to work note so I can go back early. The other part of my brain is thinking I may start to feel better period wise tomorrow but in my head I need more time.

Pain wise I have had cramping and the endless toilet trips have started to turn to not being able to go properly. I am still feeling dizzy and having some dull aching in my bad tube and ovary side.

I added my period in to my app on my phone and it calculated Xmas day to be next period date. Oh great!

 I am finding every advert or tv programme is talking about babies, trying for a family or happy families.

I just want to feel like me again, I know it’s early but I am already frustrated. I think i might call the fertility counsellor tomorrow and schedule in a chat. 

I think it might help to offload to someone not personally involved in the whole process. 

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