Well yesterday I woke up after a nightmare about my hubby cheating on me, it was horrible. I went downstairs for a cuddle with him to make me feel reassured.
As the morning progressed I became increasingly down in the dumps and emotional. I was still running back and forth to the toilet every hour passing small motions. I ddnt feel in control and the pain got worse over the day. I was starting to worry about the afternoon family gathering that was arranged. I knew that a single word or nag would send me over the edge to be stressed and upset.
After a teary soak in the bath and a chat to my husband I decided I shouldn’t go. I need to be looking after number one and keeping myself away from the things that set me back.
We popped out to the shop and had a cuppa in the sun before heading home to rest up. I explained to my Dad and sister in law why I wouldn’t be coming but I would see them later at a smaller gathering. I took painkillers and had a lay down to try and cam myself down.
Early evening we went out and I managed to enjoy the evening as the anti inflammatory did their job.
Over the weekend I have adapted my diet to be a little plainer and cut out the fibre flakes I eat every day. I have been having the intense cramps and pressure most of the weekend and today I started to get period cramps and spotting.
The cramps seem to pass to my bowels and I feel desperate and need to push but only clear fluid comes out. I have been doing a lot of reading into IBS, and other bowel complaints but many are hard to diagnose and understand.
I started Yakult today to help with a healthy gut and I am starting to think I may have a clue to whats going on in my body right now.
This is how I see it:
The HRT is sending mixed signals to my womb telling it to build lining and also to shed the lining. A the womb tries to shed it contracts as it would within a normal period. This time the womb is confused and trying its best to shed contracting again and again. Whilst that’s happening its likely as the womb contracts it puts pressure on the bowel and makes it contract as if pushing out a movement. This causes the bowel to be irritated and release more mucus to try and empty even if it doesn’t need to.
This is just my explanation of what I think is happening, but who knows if i am right. If this is the case i am thinking that if my bowel comes back as clear in the investigation I will ask for a full hysterectomy therefore removing the uterine contractions from the mix. Of course I have to discuss this all with my surgeon but I a confident he will advise me correctly if this is the right next step.
I am having my stent removed tomorrow lunchtime so it will be interesting to see how i feel after and if anything major changes symptom wise.
My next appointment with my surgeon is the 3rd May which isn’t too far away now so I will get some sort of answers or opinion.
I am trying to relax as much as i can between bathroom trips and cramps and try to look forward if possible rather than dwell on the everyday difficulties. This in itself is a challenge but again as they say: “just keep swimming”