My body – My Choice

After another horrible evening of pain, and trips to the loo during the night I have had enough. I feel like i need to take some control back!

I am urgently running to the bathroom every hour and I am gradually losing my sanity. I think my hubby is feeling the same. We are frustrated and stuck in a rut…….

This morning when i got up I knew something had to change and my gut is telling me that something isnt right. I really believe that HRT is causing these symptoms and I need to know if i am right. I could be waiting weeks/months to have my colonoscopy and I know that the longer this goes on the worse I am feeling emotionally.

One lady on the support group reminded me it is my choice in the end and my body.

I have decided to stop the HRT. I need to know what happens when i stop and if my bowel symptoms reduce. Then I can make an informed decision as I am fed up with guessing.

My meals are making no difference whatsoever and the Buscopan is having no effect. Running away from your desk in an open plan office every hour is not ideal!

I have spoken to a colleague today and she has been seeing a herbalist for a few years. She had so many dietary/allergy problems and it really sorted her out.

If I am going to consider Menopause without HRT I will need to look into alternatives to keep me healthy. I want to try and do this as naturally as I can taking into account Bone health and my mood.

I need to be proactive in my own treatment and at the moment I am in limbo waiting for ‘medical professionals’ to tell me whats wrong and what to take and its just not working.

So far today I feel fine in general, still going to the loo every hour but I am at least managing to have a few Bowel movements within the cramping, blood and mucus.

Its going to take a while for the HRT to come out of my system and I expect i will bleed and gradually feel the menopause symptoms come back. Then I will see the herbalist about getting tests and natural remedies. I also need to find exercises to do to help with bone health (I need to start doing exercise anyway)

We have a trip away in June and I do not want to be where i am not symptom wise because it will spoil the trip, and my quality time with my hubby. I want to move forward and I am definitely going round in circles at the moment.

I am concerned about the effect all my problems are having on our marriage and I need to show positivity and hope to help spur my hubby on to feel the same.

Who knows what to come but I need to feel like i am at least ruling out what i think the problem is and go from there.

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