Sorry its been so long.
To be honest I haven’t had the desire to write lately and I am not sure why.
This was an amazing trip! Beautiful surroundings, gorgeous weather and quality time with my husband. We had time to relax in each others company and become closer. We explored the city, lounged in Bistros and sampled the treats. I was unable to be gluten free over there are the choices were slim but I kept up my water and ate as healthy meals as I could you compensate.
It was so hot and on the day before we came home I struggled with the hay fever and drowsiness that came with the meds I tool for it. So we took it a bit easier that day.
When we came home it was back down to earth with a bump!
We were both aggravated and my aunt went into hospital again with a reoccurring condition. Its been a very busy time of organizing hospital visits, dog walking etc
During this time I have been trying to keep focused with improving my menopause symptoms.
I have particularly noticed a difference in my joints feeling pain after minimal walking or sitting in one position too long. I must admit to starting to worry about the long term effects of not having the hormones to protect my body. I realized I really need to focus on making some changes.
At the beginning of the week I started ‘Menopause Support’ supplements, Calcium and Vitamin D3 and Evening Primrose oil.
I have also started some evening exercises to help with bone strength. These include lunges, squats, push ups off the wall or side of sofa, stepping and lifting a light weight on each arm (suncream bottle etc)
I have already started to notice an improvement with a combination of those things.
I am increasing my intake of water and I have Probiotic pessaries I am using every few days to help with the natural health down below.
I am still eating non gluten free which has slowed things down a bit although extra water and senna every couple of days seems to keep things working.
My hot flashes had been very regular and vicious, with the extra heat its been a challenge. They have slowed down a bit since starting all the supplements. I have had some light anxiety and very occasional nausea but it passes.
I have been very open with people lately about the emotional effects all this is having on me. I am having moments (particularly around families) that I feel emotional and consider the loss of the chance to have our own family and experience the family days out and milestones other people go through.
I hope that my hubby and family don’t resent me for being able to provide this god given right.
We still have challenges around my intimacy and confidence but now it is more open and my hubby and I have discussed it more openly and the effects it has on him I feel I can push myself a bit more to take some forward steps.
We discussed how important it is for us to have some time with friends to vent and be with other people to help us be more patient and take some time to rest.
A big subject for us is our planned move to Oz and I know that my hubby is very restless to get home to his family and friends. It can put a strain and pressure on me to get better quicker, and its hard for people to understand although physically I am a lot stronger I have issues to go though mentally.
We plan to go in March 2018 and start a new journey together. I am very excited about the opportunities but equally scared about leaving the people I love.
Especially with my aunt being so poorly lately and the pressure on my mum to care for us all.
I feel guilty at leaving them here and not being here for certain things that may happen. I know I have to live my own life as they wont be here forever but that scares me even more.
My hubby has fears that I wont cope which of course is only natural. I can only reassure him that I will try my best and that I understand what he is missing out on and I cant predict the outcome.
Its now time for us to book our journey and start to plan our new beginning and as time goes on I hope that my confidence will return. Also my confidence in this Country has been rocked with all the events lately.
We have a few more trips planned before we leave including the F1, Amsterdam and London.
Work has been very quiet at times which has meant I have been unfocused at times and it makes the days drag. I will miss it here but I am looking forward to a new opportunity.
Anyway that’s where we are right now.