This has been a hard one for me. As the hormones decrease so does the confidence. The body shape and weight changes, the muscles and bones become weaker, the libido lessens and the person you were seems to be left behind.
I am beginning to fear old age, deterioration and losing people close to me. I have gone through stages of cringing at the sight of my dryer skin, red eyes and lank hair.
I found myself trawling through eBay pages of extensions and wigs. I even bought myself a wig and became more and more frustrated at myself for liking all the clothes for younger women.
But as I looked in the mirror I start to want to be myself. I don’t want to be fake and enhanced. I just want to be me. The fact that physically I am changing is something I guess I will come to understand in time. But how much time do we actually have to adjust and do we waste time thinking about it.
So how do we learn to embrace the change? I want to learn to love who I am right now. Yes it’s ok to improve lifestyle but not to try to change who you are.
So back to square one. Starting with little walks, step and lunge exercises to try and make a slow muscle improvement. Get back on Glucosamine and calcium.
Take more time on my own hair and skin. I have been recommended magnesium cream to try on my skin which I have started by putting a small bit on my ankle to check I don’t react to it.
Maybe part of the old me had gone but that doesn’t me the new me can’t be awesome